Doubt Comes (draft)

Doubt Comes at lunchtime.

For thirty minutes

it takes up the space

were food should go.

a persistent climb up

esophagus,

I choke back water.

Keep it down. 

Poisonous it seeps into blood

rattles my hands.

rings my drums.

rangles both lungs

Sleep doubt says.

so, heart slows

Sleep.

eyes fall on soft

pillowed

cheek.

No.

 

 

 

 

For thirty years

doubt take up the space

were confidence should have gone.

 

For the Want of Nothing (draft)

I have atrophied in these sheets.

They cling to me,

sweat gathers in sickness

and in health I know nothing but want.

Yet, need lingers in the door

beckons, but does not come forth.

My dreams run rampant like pixies;

they are splashes of imaginary colour ,

no paper can hold them.

Outside the barren tree branches lacked the strength

to hold onto their colourful autumn,

I lack the strength (will) to even manifest a fall,

So, I’ve fallen into a bed of leaves

(which I did not rake)

Please. Decompose this body,

feed the corpse to the worms-

this is the only way I know to celebrate a harvest.